“Your Husband Hoovers, Oh Aren’t You Lucky!!!”

I will start by saying that yes, I would deem myself “lucky” that I have a very active and hands on husband.

But I hate that this is referred to as lucky!!!IMG_3034

When we bought our house (9 years ago this year, oh my god) we bought it collectively and equally as a couple… Two adults signed the dotted line!!!
Therefore, housework & cooking etc can be done by both people equally. Stephen is well able to clean and cook, just as well as me.
But why is it such a huge deal if he does? “Oh, aren’t you lucky how he helps around the house?” Sorry now. What??????? It’s his bloody house as well!!  Meanwhile, when a woman does anything it’s just the norm and expected, as opposed to anything marvellous!!! I would say that, generally, everything in our house is equally shared, EXCEPT planning!!! I plan and organise everything.
It’s not because Stephen won’t, it’s just I’m better at it! He is better at clearing the shower drain, and lots of other things, so he does those things!!!!
Due to my pelvis issues, and the possibility of me causing further damage during pregnancy, I’m fairly immobile at the minute.
So, Stephen has to do an awful lot more than me. But let’s be fair, I’m growing a human, not having a 9-month spa break! He does it because it needs to be done, not to be hailed a hero!
He likes to live in a clean, tidy house, that’s the crux of the matter. But it’s becoming increasingly common for me to hear how grateful I should be that he is helping me!!!
Seriously lads, I’m pretty sure it took two of us to make this baby!!!

It frightens me that in 2017 women who are in a man/woman cohabiting situation and are raising children are still deemed to hold the sole responsibility!
Once Rebecca came on the scene this “lucky” business ramped up another notch! I actually remember going away for a hen before and having someone ask me “Who will have Rebecca while you’re away?” When I replied,
“Her Father” the response I got was, “Now isn’t he very good for taking her for you”. I swear I nearly got sick! This is the same when people refer to “babysitting” their own children!!
Looking after your own children is never babysitting. FULL STOP!!!

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If Stephen was sick I would look after him and do everything I could to keep things ticking over. Would anyone come telling him how lucky he was? OF COURSE NOT.
Sure, it’s just to be expected!! I work part-time so pre-pregnancy I did a lot of the house work. But that’s only fair as he is in work outside of the house more than me.
So, it’s only natural that I would do more at home and do more for Rebecca.
It kind of sounds like I’m ranting a bit now and I suppose I am. I just don’t think anyone, male or female, should be told they are “lucky” in these instances.
I do feel that I am very lucky, of course, but this is because I married someone who respects me, supports me & makes me feel loved and secure, not because he hoovers or equally looks after OUR CHILD!!!
This isn’t by any means a big feminist style rant, but I do feel that, in this day and age, women and men should be seen as equals, especially when it comes to the raising of their children and in the upkeep of their own house!!!
I grew up in a house where my dad was always very hands on, even though he worked full time and my mam was at home with us. So maybe this is why I expected no less!
I hope now that Rebecca grows up and picks a partner who sees them both as equals!

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My Top Tips to Booking a Holiday!

*Direct Direct Directwhenever possible! If you know where you want to stay go and find the actual hotels website! 99% of hotels all over the world have their own website and most give the option to translate to English. Even If you can only get a phone Number for the hotel ring them, just like you would a Hotel in Ireland! The benefit with this is a lot of the time you should get the lowest rate as your cutting out the middle man! When booking direct with the hotel you wont be relying on anyone else to secure you’re booking. A lot of the time when booking this way they will only ask for a Credit Card to hold the booking and you then pay on Arrival. Just always ensure you receive an Email Confirmation. If you haven’t picked your hotel yet Booking.com is a great site for finding Accommodation as you can filter it to your needs. Of course you could go ahead and book it on their site but Id recommend trying the Direct approach if Possible.

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*Insurance always book Insurance! It actually makes great sense to book an annual policy because the majority of them will cover trips in Ireland aswell as abroad and they don’t always cost that much extra. I’ve been using Multi trip for our annual Family Policies for the last few years. Always read the Fine Print to make Sure your covered for what you need. But no matter what Insurance is essential.

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*Take Reviews with a Pinch of Salt! I am one of those people who spends hours trawling through TripAdvisor reading every single review and then totally clouding my Judgement. Don’t read 5 good reviews and be instantly put off by 1 bad one. There will always be people who just like to complain. Make a list of things you require and find your answers in the reviews. Also don’t forget a Picture Paints a thousand words I find the traveler photos section on TripAdvisor is where the truth Lies.

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*Book a transfer in advance! I personally when affordable always like to book a private transfer. There is nothing quite like arriving into the airport to a friendly face holding a sign with your name ready and willing to help. They escort you to your (normally) air-conditioned car and bring you safely to your accommodation. We have always used Shuttle Direct they do a range of Transfer options from Cheap as Chips Shared Shuttles to high end Executive Cars. I’ve never had an issue with them to date.

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*Think outside the box! The Likes of Falcon or Sunway etc also offer a flight only service to the places they operate Package Holidays. So for instance if you want to fly to Palma check Ryanair & Aerlingus obviously but also check Falcon’s website for Flight only. You can add on baggage and seats just like all other airlines but you may get the full flight with the extras a lot cheaper.

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*Pay the few bob and pick your seat! Especially if flying with Children. I know it’s an extra expense but in my experience its one that’s very worthwhile. I like the peace of Mind of knowing our seating is together and secure.

**DISCLAIMER** All opinions are Purely my Own. I have no affiliation with any of the above mentioned business or sites and Nothing to Declare.

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Mind The Bump…….

Yep we are going to become four!

Turns out we had a really great Christmas and baby Rattigan number two is due to make an appearance in September.

Trying to hide the fact you’re pregnant when you have a (tiny) social media presence is a tad difficult. I went from someone who cooked almost every day on my Snapchat, to someone who could barely stand in the kitchen long enough to pour cereal without needing to run to the bathroom. I’m sure some eagle eyed people have noticed the lack of cooking and non-existence of alcohol. I even staged it a few times to make it look like I was drinking, however I reckon I failed!

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A second pregnancy I’m sure for most women is totally different to the first. The cotton wool from round one is wrapped slightly thinner. When I was pregnant on Rebecca I could have told you down to the second how far along I was. This time around I’m just about managing to keep track of the weeks. I had approximately three apps on my phone last time to tell me what each new week would bring and what size the baby was. However last week I found myself deleting my “what to expect when you’re expecting” app to make space for Spotify.

The most welcome change this time round (as selfish as it may sound) is I don’t feel like my pregnancy is a band aid for myself and my family/friends. Finding out I was pregnant with Rebecca was a light at the end of a very dark tunnel. Knowing we were losing my mam in the coming days, but gaining a new person in a few months, almost gave us something to carry on for. I didn’t realise until I fell pregnant this time, how much I missed out on the first time. Of course there was excitement and happiness when I told people but it was always marred with a sympathetic look due to the fact I was about to face into my first pregnancy just days after losing my mam. Planning to tell my nanny (my mams mother) I was pregnant was one of the last conversations I had with my mam. She had just started to drift into that long three day sleep. She feebly asked me had I told my nanny, which I hadn’t yet. I made my way to the family room and told my nanny who was obviously thrilled, but concerned for me at the same time. I returned to mams bedside and told her “nanny knows”, she gave me a nod and a smile, and we didn’t get to speak again. I decided this time everything was going to be different, that each time I told someone it would be exciting and exactly as it should be.

I always knew finding out I was pregnant the second time around was going to be difficult, as it’s the only part of my pregnancy my mam was Involved in the last time. However, for those first few seconds when I found out, I was just shocked and roaring for Stephen to come up the stairs. It was the faintist line I’d ever seen, and you nearly had to stand on one leg and squint to see it. As they say a line is a line regardless of how faint it is, and it was enough for us to have a little excited dance around the kitchen. After a few hours the shock wore off and the sinking feeling started to set in, so I just picked up the phone and rang my dad to tell him. He was over the moon and we had a little chat about my mam and I felt a bit better. We spent the next few days telling Stephen’s parents, my best friend’s, our brothers and their partners. It was of course still very early, but these are the people I would need if anything was to go wrong. Trying to hide everything from Rebecca had become increasingly difficult once my sickness had fully kicked in. So at nine weeks we had a private scan. We took the risky decision of bringing Rebecca with us telling her that the doctor was going to look inside mammies belly and tell us if there was a baby there or not. As the consultant proceeded with the scan Rebecca was jumping up and down beside me waiting for the news, and thankfully after what felt like a lifetime, the consultant give us the nod and mentioned the heartbeat flickering away. To see Rebecca’s eyes light up and hear her screech “Daddy there’s a baby in mammies belly” was truly amazing, and made all the sickness I’m facing worthwhile.

Dating Scan

The next day I collected Rebecca from playschool and drove straight to my nannies house. We only got into the house about two minutes before Rebecca was shouting “nanny I’m getting a baby”. My nanny was absolutely delighted, and I don’t think she fully believed it until I gave her the tiny scan pictures. The rest of the weekend we spent telling the remainder of our family and close friends. I was already showing, and between that, and how sick I was, I had enough of hiding it.


I’d love to lie and say it’s been much easier this time under the circumstances, and in ways it really has been. However that feeling of having a “missing piece” has grown as the weeks have gone by. I was on the phone to my dad a few weeks ago, and during the conversation my mind drifted off (sorry dad). Momentarily I was waiting for him to say “ok I’m putting your mam on” just like five years had never passed.  After a few seconds that horrible realisation hit me and I became very upset, I didn’t tell my dad and I got off the phone as quick as possible. I then cried for hours on and off and I couldn’t even explain to poor Stephen what was wrong because I couldn’t get the words out. He just asked “was it about my mam?” and he knew he didn’t have to ask anything else.

I’ve now had my dating scan, and we got to see a very active, healthy baby, and for anyone who has had that scan it’s the most amazing thing to see. I’m struggling a little lately with sickness, and my pelvis pain due to my previous injury, but I’ll be fine. It’s very annoying when everyone says “oh but isn’t it all worth it”. Of course it absolutely is, but sometimes you’d like to hear “it’s worth it, but feck it’s hard sometimes”. So for now that’s all from me, I’m ecstatic to be bringing another crazy child into this world with the man of my dreams (oh crap I need to puke again hehe).

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